When Life Gets Tough, These Coping Mechanisms Can Help Get You Through (Works For Me)

It’s been a year of research for me while not really knowing what to do and how to earn a steady income. What I found out is mind boggling. So much opportunities and ways to be amazed. But I want to write about coping mechanisms to keep my sanity and be happy and grateful for what this world is becoming to be.

In the next decade or so we will see switch in the world. Every day, technology is growing strong, people are working harder then ever, having more than anyone in history, being both happy, sad, loved and hated.

Here are some ideas what I do to stay on track while I’m figuring out how to move on.

Talk to someone you trust

When you’re feeling overwhelmed, talking to someone you trust can help you feel better. Sometimes it’s helpful to talk to someone who’s been through a similar situation. Other times, it’s helpful to talk to someone who can offer impartial support and advice.

That person is my wife. There is no other person in the world even comparable to her. Being married is a blessing, a sacred union of two becoming one. Good wife will soothe and heal you and care for you and give you new life and purpose. Talk with her and connect deeply and surrender.

Get moving, but if you like stay in bed

Exercise is a great way to relieve stress. It can also help you feel more positive and energized. But I hate exercising. It makes me an angry, testosterone fueled, flexing and craving for food. Exercising makes me stronger physically, but I become a bitch actually. I do feel emasculated and I can pretty fast become a beast of a guy, but it ends in a way that I annoy myself and my life goes to shit.

So I lay down instead and limit my food intake and drink water or sometimes I just drink, but that’s not the best thing to do. I like to stay in bed instead, put on Metallica and listen to The Unforgiven. Or Pink Floyd. Or Tool. Or Led Zeppelin. Or some good dark drill from those new kids who wear diamond watches and drive Lambos. Popping two Xanax pills makes me blissful and comfortably numb.

Connect with nature and hug an oak if you can

Spending time in nature can help you feel calmer and more connected to the world around you. No shit Sherlock! Connecting with nature becomes luxury because I escape to nature to escape engulfing digital technology that I wear on myself and in which I’m involved most of my days.

I wrote article about Shinrin Yoku here. If you check my blog you can notice that I have an Airbnb in nature in Croatian rural area surrounded by forests full of magnificent trees and all kinds of secrets. I enjoy escaping to nature just to not stare at the screen. It lifts me up for a couple a days, only one day in nature fuels me for half a week. Wandering the forest and hugging trees or praying there.

Make time for yourself and use it proactively with deep insight

It’s important to make time for activities that make you happy. Whether it’s reading, taking a bath, or going for a walk, taking some time for yourself can help you recharge. This is a true statement, but how can you make time for yourself when you have so much to do! There’s so much to do, to improve the world, so much untapped potential, where is my first million euros? I don’t care about money. I don’t have any and I’m living, and life is a blessing when you figure out the truth about who you are. That needs time, that needs pain, that needs letting go! I surrender myself to time, so see what time will do with me.

Be mindful, but I prefer to be empty

Mindfulness is a technique that can help you focus on the present moment and let go of stress and worry. What I do instead, I practice what Yeshua or Jesus did. He emptied himself becoming responsive to the Spirit of God. That is the practice of kenosis — emptying. Becoming no one and all. Paradoxical practice, but it works wonders. It means to fill yourself to the brim with His grace and feel it. Mindfulness sound like a Buddhist term for me, and I ain’t Buddhist. I am the one who belongs to the flock of sheep who’s guide is Jesus Christ the Nazorean. Nazorean meaning “measured” in other words, perfect. Why should be mindful of anything while I can be empty (of worries, of fear, of abandonment, of death) feeling only love to the fullest.

Practice gratitude

Focusing on what you’re grateful for can help you feel more positive and optimistic. And that is true. There are so many things we take for granted. Like running fresh water, electricity, internet, music, art, toothpick, running toilet, working computer, being alive, eating a warm soup, being loved by someone, being kind on yourself, forgive and it will be forgiven to you. But forgive yourself and be grateful to yourself for staying strong, healthy and happy. You can help yourself to love yourself. World outside you is cursed from the inception. And there is very very narrow door to salvation.

Connect with others

Spending time with friends and loved ones can help you feel supported. Sometimes friends just disappear making all kind of excuses. I know they are bullshitting me because I do not want to succumb to their outdated and stupid agendas.

When I was in my 20’s friends were everywhere. All ready to get drunk, get high, to be idiots and share gibberish language and decadent lifestyle in an Dionysian fashion. Go insane if necessary, the world awaits us! I was a fool, I never really connected with anyone. There’s a void in me, and I lack connection. And it all suddenly changed. Apollonian nature hit me, I started to reason, to fight what is bad in me, search the right way, work more, be stronger and say freely fuck off my friends.

You’re here when I’m happy, where are you when I cry in my basement alone with a bottle of red wine over tragedy of humankind being overly empathetic and loving everyone? Where are you when I look at the picture of drunken Silenius? But there is one person who is crying with me in my drunken nature and wipes my tears off. My beloved wife.

When connecting with others be careful. Most of the talk is cheap, people are broke, claiming spiritual but are fake prophets, assuring you, but when they disappear over the corner talk shit about you.

There is a legion of those who are to get your money, offering you everything imaginable. There’s toxicity of the world, and be mindful to turn on filters when connecting with others.

Beware, I said to connect with others but don’t listen to me. I prefer to be alone or trusted person. Don’t connect with anyone, fuck them. But if you do, test wisely and turn on your bullshit filters on and make the connection true and real.



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Tomislav Pavlečić

Tomislav Pavlečić


Croatian. SEO guy in IT industry. I like AI so far. Degree in Journalism. Husband. Love trees, berry grower. Airbnb host | https://haskap.club